Rent Fifty Shades of Grey on Amazon Video (paid link) // Buy the book (paid link)
Written by: Kelly Marcel (screenplay by), E.L. James (based on the novel by)
Directed by: Sam Taylor-Johnson
Starring: Dakota Johnson, Jamie Dornan, Jennifer Ehle, Luke Grimes, Marcia Gay Harden, Callum Keith Rennie
Rated: R
Watch the trailer
Plot
Literature student Anastasia Steele's life changes forever when she meets handsome, yet tormented, billionaire Christian Grey.
Verdict
From the very beginning this is bad. The dialog is terrible and the movie is way too long. By the time I reached the half way mark I was all but checked out. After an hour, it starts going downhill quickly. Despite the length it doesn't even have a conclusion. The movie just stops. It doesn't have a point, hoping that being alluring is enough. It's not, and for this movie it's not even close. This is drivel.
Skip it.
Review
I've made fun of this movie frequently without ever having seen it. With the lack of new movies available, I saw this available on streaming and decided to see if it was as bad as presumed. I had heard it was bad and it certainly is. The novel started as Twilight fan fiction. Characters were revised and it was eventually published and later adapted for film. It's origin is certainly a clue.
No time is wasted confirming this is bad. It's so dumb. Ana (Dakota Johnson) trips over nothing entering Christian's (Jamie Dornan) office to reinforce her awkwardness. She's there to interview him as a he's a great businessman. The movie doesn't elaborate past he does business and is rich.
This movie isn't far from parody. The dialog during the interview is rough, and it never gets any better. Conversations aren't natural. This is some kind of fantasy story, but I'm not sure for whom. This characterizes the male fantasy as wanting a completely subservient sex slave while all women want is someone rich and handsome. This businessman with a control fetish meets an inexperienced coed. It's not novel or even intriguing. I don't think it's pretentious as much as it's ignorant
 |
| Jamie Dornan, Dakota Johnson play Christian, Ana |
This wants to be cryptic, but it ends up as annoying. We're told so many times Christian has a dark past. He never answers any questions. His past boils down to his sex dungeon. This movie is a script about a sex dungeon. Ana has to decide whether she wants to pursue a relationship with Christian where his dungeon features prominently. Even I grew tired of her prolonged decision. I was done with this movie well before an hour and a half, but it's so much longer than that. After an hour it gets progressively worse with each minute.
How many times do we have to hear Christian say 'it's the way I am.' The culmination of the movie is Ana wanting to see just how screwed up Christian is after telling her such throughout the movie. She's then shocked at his fetishes when she asked to see the worst. Who didn't see that coming? Every story beat is predictable. After that the movie doesn't even provide a conclusion. It just stops. I suppose that's a benefit as I wouldn't want to sit through anymore to see what stilted resolution this would have forced upon viewers.
No comments :
Post a Comment