Monday, August 20, 2018

Bangkok Dangerous Movie Review

Bangkok Dangerous (2008)
Rent Bangkok Dangerous on Amazon Video
Written by: Jason Richman (Screenplay), Oxide Chun Pang & Danny Pang (1999 movie)
Directed by: Danny Pang, Oxide Chun Pang (as The Pang Brothers)
Starring: Nicolas Cage, Charlie Yeung, Shahkrit Yamnarm
Rated: R
Watch the trailer

Plot
A hitman who's in Bangkok to pull off a series of jobs violates his personal code when he falls for a local woman.

Verdict
This is bland action movie that is content to recycle content we've already seen with a shallow plot that provides a contrived basis for the entire movie. Cage was obviously bored during this movie and so was I. The ending is a cool concept, but it has so little build up that it falls flat. That two minutes is all you need to see of this movie. There really isn't any context to it and that's the problem. Cage's character is willing to risk everything for a girl he's never talked to. At no point is that believable.
Skip it.

Review
Whenever I watch a Nicolas Cage movie, I remember the sole reason he did Drive Angry (read my review), it's because his character was going to be shot in the eye and he always wanted that to happen to a character he played. That's all he needed to know to agree to that movie. Cage's barrier for entry to be in a movie is very low, hence Bangkok Dangerous.

In the original Thai movie on which this is based, the hitman was deaf which made him fearless. The directors/writers of the original who remade this version noted that from a marketing perspective Nic Cage needed to have a few lines.

This starts with the question of what does Cage's character do, with him talking about his occupation in generalities. We quickly figure out the what when we see him assembling a a sniper rifle in the next scene.
Joe states the money is good, but isn't the money great? It's semantics, and he never states how much he makes. Other movies always put the cost per hit at around twenty five thousand a hit. The 1983 book Hitman: A Technical Manual for Independent Contractors, written by one "Rex Feral puts the cost at thirty thousand minimum.
For the risk is the money just good? At first I was thinking a night of work, but with preparation time it could be a week or month if not longer. Maybe he's right it's just "good" for the time invested, factor in weapons, training, preparation, and risk. Risk is a big factor.

Is his real hair or a wig? Did he see Tom Hanks in The Da Vinci code and say, hold on Tom let me show you how bad hair is done. The front at the top of his forehead looks like typical Cage hair, but the back looks like a cheap wig. Does he have a weave?

As an assassin, Joe lives by four rules., but who taught him these rules? That person had a dark outlook on life.
1. Don't ask questions. There is no right or wrong.
2. Take no interest in people outside of work. Trust no one.
3. Erase all trace, remain anonymous.
4. Know when to get out.

He's presented as ruthless. He infiltrates a local area, gets a low level contact, then covers his tracks and kills the contact leaving no trace. We see that happen after the job in the first scene, but anytime a movie presents a list of rules like this you know the character will break them.

Why does every assassin movie have them on the last job that is the big payday? You're good at your job, why stop? Keep making that money. You can't have too much money, but in every movie we see the best assassin ever and all they want to do is get out. Where is their tenacity, the perseverance? I wish Cage would say something like, it's not the killing, it's all the travel. I'm always jet lagged and I'm  tired of it.

With the motorcycle, and this is a big plot point, which sets the entire movie into motion, Joe gets scratched, but is that little girl holding rebar? I saw her at first when Joe leaves for the job and it looks like wood sticks. Joe comes back from the job and when it scratches him it looks like rebar. I watched this scene three times. It doesn't look like it hits him shoulder level, more thigh level. The first time I saw it, I thought it hit the gas tank of the bike. If Joe's wearing leather, it should be a bruise at most. if no leather, it should be much worse assuming it is rebar.
The pharmacy scene is so weird. Fon the pharmacist is just staring at Joe. She says nothing, she signs nothing, and while it's to make us wonder what's going on, in the real world it's weird. Then the main pharmacist steps in and we discover Fon is deaf. At first I wondered if there was something wrong with her. Why is she looking at him like that. Is he her first customer ever?

Kong gets attacked during a pickup for Joe but he knifes his attackers' shins. I've never seen that defense before. Why do people want the case? Are they after Joe, Kong, or something else entirely.

Joe and Kong have a choreographed attack your neck with a knife dance that concludes with Joe stating, "That was your first lesson." I don't know what it is about Cage and his delivery. He just seems so disinterested. Cage is typically bored or crazy in his movies, and in this one he's bored. With the hair, and reading off cue card delivery, this movie is rough.
He breaks his rules for Kong because he sees himself in Kong. I don't buy that reason. He's lived this long because of the rules, and breaks them because of their knife dance? Because he likes Kong's hair? What is it?
Does he ever share his four rules with Kong? We never see it, and if he did there would be an embarrassing and awkward moment about how you kill the contact. Would Joe look deep into Kong's eyes and say, but not you? I'd never do that to you. If I'm Kong and  hear that rule, I'm going to bounce. If Joe doesn't tell him the rules, he's not a very good mentor.


Joe breaks his rules again for Fon, the deaf pharmacy girl. This is even more egregious than Kong as there is no reason. They haven't even had a conversation. Is it one of those things where he breaks one rule and the house of cards falls? The movie tries to make us believe they like being in the same vicinity and not speaking, but that's not an enduring relationship.
Joe has a deeper relationship with Kong than Fon. Is Kong supposed to be so conspicuous when he drops the case? I didn't think so, who knows anymore.

Joe meets Fon's mom, and they still haven't had a conversation. A banker is his cover. At one point Joe comes up behind Fon, but shouldn't she be more startled since she can't hear? Instead she just turns and smiles. At this point I was bored of hearing Cage sound out words.

In Heat, de Niro's McCauley considers getting out of the life but sticks to his rules. It's a great moment in that movie where he faces a choice. When the heat comes around the corner, he drops everything. There is nothing like that in this movie.
For the life of me I can't figure out why Joe likes this girl. They have no relationship as they've never talked about anything. It has to be pure infatuation, what else can it be, so why the attachment? Why in the world would he meet her mom?

And his side kick, another why. This needs events to trigger breaking the rules. Cage has been a hit man what twenty or thirty  years based on how old he looks. Why change it up now without a precipitating event? As cliche as it is, why not have him accidentally kill Fon of Kong's brother and have that be the reason to break his rules as penance?
The gondola cowboy Cage botch up.
Why does a woman talking to Kong have any affect on Joe's shot? It shouldn't. He planned to carry out the hit on a busy river, but now it's a problem. Why not just do the job. These scenes make it seem he's afraid people will see the bad guy get shot, but Joe's on a river among dozens of people. What in the world? The gondola chase makes Joe look quite inept. Has he just had Cage luck the entire time? Is it lucky hair?

The underwater shot with the bullets piercing the bottom of boat and through the water is the best scene of the movie. That's a compliment and an insult. I'd rather watch bullets moving through water than any other scene in this movie.
So much of this movie is bad action movie cliches done poorly. If this was self aware at all it could be kind of funny, instead it's just a trite and cheap knock off. It seems like the entire script is, let's do this it will be cool. Why? Who cares about why, make it work. It doesn't work.

When he's attacked with Fon he dispatches the attackers and she has no idea, I thought for sure he was just going to continue walking beside her and she'd never know. What an opportunity and the movie squanders it. This could have been the best scene in the movie.

There is no basis for his second thoughts on the political figure job. There was a half hearted attempt with Kong seeing this political guy on TV and stating how good he is but that's not enough. Joe is a cold blooded killer. He's met two people in Bangkok, and doesn't have a legitimate relationship with either of them. Why does he care? This had some voice over in the beginning, if we had more of that to explain why he broke these rules and made him more decisive maybe that would help.

This follows the rule of cool rather than realism. While that can be okay the over the top isn't all that exciting here. It's not good, it's not abhorrently bad, it's just a low rent action movie. I'm curious to see the original. I'd be willing to gamble it's better than this. Budget didn't help this movie at all. With low budget you're forced to be creative, with a little bit of budget you just create the same action set pieces as everyone else.

The last gun shot is a cool concept, but the set up could have been better. Then again I really don't see why he couldn't escape.

An alternate ending had Joe saved by Kong and then laying low with help from the locals before taking a boat to flee the country.

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